^ "Stop it! Stop! He didn't mean it!"-
Former sub-machine gun toting ("I showed you your first Tec on tour with Large Professor") crack-dealer and convicted knife-attacker Jay-Z, has apparently threatened R&B pop-tart Chris Brown for allegedly beating his girlfriend, the Jigga-mentored, ella-ella-ella singing, R&B pop-tart Rihanna at a pre-Grammy's party.
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Now, if Jay would have threatened my safety in '88, I'd have gone on the lam. For a decade. But in 2009, Hova's threats don't hold much sway. He's Bill Gates's buddy. He hangs out with Chris, Gwyn, Apple and Oyster Card (or whatever their latest kid is called). He wins United Nations humanitarian awards for chrissakes! If he farts, it's in the news. So what is he going to do to me, knowing that it's now fully in the public realm? If I was Chris Brown, I'd be thinking... does S-dot want to slap fire out of me THAT MUCH that he'll risk a huge lawsuit and have to go into his pockets for 7 figures? The definitive answer is this: No. He doesn't.
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UPDATE: Rihanna's grandma says she's 'fine'. Phew.
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